The Teddy Bear Song Songtext

I want to be a Star Trek teddy bear
So I can "Live long and prosper," but who cares?
And eat gagh, they're worms that are rarer than rare
'Cause I'm a Star Trek teddy bear

Life as a teddy bear is hard
You stay indoors when they play in the yard
And no one tucks you in at night
Or wakes you up when it's just getting light
And instead you just get a lot of abuse
They chewed off your eyes without an excuse
And they drool on your fur
Yeah, they drool on your fur
(And it's really gross)

So can I be anyone but me
Try a change of reality
'Cause the world of a teddy bear just isn't fun
And when the kids come, I just want to run away