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Hey, it's Link. I'm back, and I'm sailing on a ship I'm the King of Red Lions! Yo, I don't give a shit If there's one thing I've learned from years of saving this land It's all I really need is a sword and shield in my hand [Danny Sexbang] But look over there, that sign says "Beware"! "A giant pit no one can jump you can't fly through the air"! You'll need a special item to get through that moat But what do I know, right? I'm just a fucking boat! Fuck, alright. Shit, okay I can maybe pick up one or two things on my way But as far as I'm concerned, all I need is "sword play" [Danny Sexbang] Shut your fucking elf mouth and take my items, okay? Your quest is long, and the road is tough The path is dark, you're gonna need a shitload of stuff No lives are spared, you better be prepared Moblin fangs and a boomerang And a cloth to shield that nasty wang! From Majora's mask to an empty flask Here's what you need to complete your task! Songtexte A bow and arrow, nice, and a skeleton key! And a second place trophy from a local spelling bee? A candle with the handle, and a single Velcro sandal Is this an old court order for a drug related scandal? No... Hey boat, all these items hurt my back, its a lot! [Danny Sexbang] Pop a Tylenol, you bitch, you've got 87 slots! Here's a hammer that can break any kind of rock that it hits Oh! And a pair of full-size studio drum kits! Ugh! A giant used Q-tip A really small cruise ship A parent's signature for a Disneyland school trip?! Documents that prove the moon landing was a hoax And a legendary sacred hidden Golden Tome Of Fart Jokes! This Wind Waker lets you control the air And this sit maker is a really comfortable reclining chair! The road is long, you must protect that schlong Noble stallions and great medallions You're a bigger deal than plumbing Italians! Sour-dough, a herd of buffalo Just a few more things and you're ready to go! Your grandma's glass eyeball 80-pounds of drywall And every single item from the March issue of Skymall? A vegan pasta maker The wrestler "Undertaker"? An odd number of crutches and a family of Quakers A basket of muffins A turkey with the stuffin' A pillow that needs fluffin'? A society of puffins! A fresh unopened box of raised-quality potato sacks 46 copies of "The Jerk" on Betamax! It's getting kinda heavy... I don't care, here's a Chevy! And the Wacky World of Minigolf Starring Eugene Levy! Oh my god I absolutely cannot carry one more thing! Don't you worry, all that's left is this single piece of string Woah...you see? This is exactly why I also packed a spinal surgeon ...I hate you, boat Aus Songtexte Mania