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Nicole Dollanganger

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Curdled like milk in the summer heat,
my skull's gone soft, my head is spoiled,
my heart's a rabid dog trying to put its teeth in you.

You thought you saw light but it was forest fires
eating me alive, my limbs are dead and dry;
my ribcage cradles dirt and weeds.
I'm empty inside.

And I will never be able to love you;
I couldn't if I tried.
And I will lie down next to you,
but I fear a dead body would feel warm compared to mine.

'Cause I'm barren
on the inside.
I'm barren,
on the inside.

You tried to make love to my empty womb,
tried to stuff me like a doll with pieces of you
but it all seeps from my loosened seams.
I took myself apart and cut off my strings,
and scrape the remains from my starving bowels,
collected them into garbage piles
to tie in bags, sink in the lake, and bury at the bottom of my sad mistakes.

'Cause I will never be able to love you -
I couldn't if I tried.
And I will lie down next to you,
but I fear a dead body would feel warm compared to mine.

'Cause I'm barren
on the inside.
I'm barren,
on the inside.
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